Clown Bondage

remember last weekend when i was way too late to my clown gig?
well, I was just the perfect amount of late, tonight at THE CHAOS CARNIVAL, at New Mountain, just now.

Pretty much nailed it. 

If you've never seen Mista Gag's Clown Bondage Experience, .. you're missing out,... if you like crazy kinky silly sexy clown acts. I believe this is my tenth time doing this act. Performed at six locations, with six different  "victuneers".

nothing feels as good as squeezing 

a whoopie cushion

between my crotch 

and the ass of a hot woman

sometimes I think improv comes close. 

but,.. not really. doesn't really come close at all. 

don't worry, I'll video tape a 'studio version'

of 

MGCBX

Hand Stand Up & The Pint

On Sunday, the eighth day of February, the year being Two Thousand and Fifffteeeen,...

Under the name Artie Pee,

At Slice Of Life Comedy's Open Mic at The Pulp,

I performed eight jokes while in a handstand against the wall, upside down for one minute and fiffffteeeeen seconds.

Don't believe me? I taped it. Watch.

I will aim for fiffffteeeen jokes in a minute and a half, tonight at The Odditorium's Comedy Freakshow Open Mic. Tuesday, I will tape it ay-gayne.

But first, I will attend improv class. Excited about our next show coming up very soon.

And, after, I will practice my top secret rap battle lyrics for Sticky Notes Productions next episode.

See our recently released improvised short, "The Pint". we shot this, improvised, at nine in the morning, at Lexington Avenue Brewery, a few weeks ago.

The Challenges, Risks, and Rewards of Clowning

I had a clown gig, last Saturday night. A private birthday for an adult male. It went better than one of the gigs from Vulgar. But, not as good as the gig at Tim Kazurinsky's house in Shakes The Clown. * I was late. Really, really late. My shit didn't go over very well. The birthday boy acted spoiled and entitled. The girl with the troll hair disappeared before I could even say 'hi'. Didn't get paid. Didn't feel like I deserved to, for being so late. But, fuck. I spent too many hours getting ready. And, riding 5 miles on a bicycle with a trailer with a tire deflating at a medium pace. I stood there, with my dick-in-a-jack-in-a-box for what felt like forever during a drum circle laced singing bowl moment of silence.

Pro's:

+ I 'made whoopie' with a twerking gay boy. (clown gag reference.)
+ I at least got a ride home.
+ Learned I don't really want to do private parties for strangers at all. Of the many kinds of performance I do, I gotta really clown for the love of it. Cuz, the $ isn't worth the time put in. I mean, no one really will want to pay me how much I really think these clown acts are worth.

Con's:

-didn't entertain as many people, as well, or enough, compared to my expectations
-felt like I was unprofessional
-spent a lot of time on something and didn't get paid for it


*to be fair to my overly self critical self,.. that scene sets the bar impossibly high. If you are a fan of clowns, I recommend both of these movies as well as Killer Klowns From Outer Space, It, and The Last Circus.

#adultpartyclown #ashevilleclown #clownfailure #shitballs

A Few Things I Really Like

*our newest FOH employee at Salsa's

*my new studio that is in a big cooler inside of a giant cooler in one of the coolest art warehouses in The River Arts District, The Phil Mechanic building.

*the social component of yoga classes at Go Yoga

*the humor of my yoga instructor tonight

*co-workers that will lend you their shorts for hot yoga

*my lifelong study of the art, business, and performance of comedy

*the way Kevin McDonald says, "Mnyum"

*ROOTS Mango Sriracha hummus

*using lists to breeze through your blog, the child's pose of blog styles

All The Improv In Half The Time, or Rigel's Studio Is Cooler

I had a full day, yesterday. (Like, when do I NOT?)

Covered a shift, mailed child support (I have a 14 yr old daughter that lives in Ohio), started another round of Improv classes with Tom Chalmers at NYS3. Then went straight to Lab Ratz practice. (Another improv troupe I'm in). One thing that resonated in class was, "Want It, Want It, Let It Go.". Which is a pretty good formula, I think. Like, "conflict, conflict, resolution". One of Kevin McDonald's sayings was "surprise and satisfy". I think these two go together and cover a lot. Like, you want to create interesting scenes to watch. Conflict is necessary for that. Agreement within a scene is important. But, without conflict, agreement gets boring. So, hopefully the two main characters of a scene should have conflicting desires. And those conflicts should escalate, and then resolve. A scene of escalation with no resolution can be entertaining. But, resolution often provides the "satisfaction" element of "surprise and satisfy".

Want It, Want It, Let It Go

&

Surprise And Satisfy

In Lab Ratz, we did some fun things. I can't remember the name of the game, but the one where one person leaves the room, and it is decided what "item" they are about to "try to return". They come back in, and try to return an item they don't know what is. The other people in the scene give clues, and the returner has to figure it out. The item I tried to return, was "Saturn's Rings". I had a blast guessing. I feel like I did well, turning each guess into a decent joke. Another thing we did, after playing an ABC game, (when every line has to start with the next letter of the alphabet), is we tried to do the scene backwards. Really good memory building practice. 

After Lab Ratz, I finally made it back to The Comedy Freakshow at The Odditorium. I haven't been back since I got back from Chicago. I feel like my set went well. The Odd crowd is generally much

smarter/more on top of it, than the crowd at The Southern. I was gonna do a thing where I did a hand stand, and do as much of my set upside down as possible. But, when my time got cut from five minutes to four minutes, to conclude the show early to let a karaoke thing start, I cut that from my plan, as I thought setting up the mic upside down would eat up too much of my time. I recommend checking out these two weekly open mics, if you have any interest in stand up comedy.

Finally,.. I just got a studio in The Phil Mechanic Building. I plan on filming comedy videos, an the daily. So, hit me up, and let's make some funny!

I'd go into more details about everything. But, I gotta hustle my way over to Salsa's. I'm managing, today, so come on by and let me entertain you.

Missing Housemate (maybe), Sweater Onesies, and Kevin McDonald superbowl.

I'm a little concerned about my housemate, Kaz McWilliam. I dont have hs phone number. and, thought i had his email. but it was just a craigslist email. Haven't seen him in about two weeks. He probably just flew to the tropics? I dunno. If you know him and know how to get in touch with him, lemme know.

Last night, I had to manage at Salsa's. Cuz, Superbowl. (Kronkberry Margarita). All the other managers care about the footballs. I don't care about the footballs, but I DID want to watch the superbowl with Kevin McDonald. And, I got to. Well,.. the last third, anyway. It was so slow at Salsa's, I was allowed to close at 8:30, and did. Was out of there by nine. Enjoyed The Dirty South Lounge in The Southern for something other than stand up comedy, for once.

After that, I went to a sweater onesie fashion show and auction. The designer also took the Kevin McDonald workshop. And, I just pieced together that she is in fact The Silver Drummer Girl. I missed the first half, with men's onesies. But, she had one not sell. It looked comfy. But if, (most likely when), I get a sweater onesie, I'd like it to be bright colors. So,.. that's probably going to happen.

#kazmcwilliam 

#kevinmcdonaldsuperbowl

#silverdrummergirl

#sweateronesies

#kronkberrymargarita

Kevin McDonald, Goodwill, and an Igloo Abattoir

I did not hustle enough to make it to Yoga. neither today, nor yesterday. aiming to try to get to the 8:30am class was helpful in making me not late for other things, however. So, not a total loss.

Managed to squeeze in a quick "Buck a Pound" "Bins" at "the Goodwill" round with Sherri Bell, looking for stuff for our act in Asheville Vaudeville, February 21st. Got an awesome new prop/travel bag, punk/statue of liberty head thing, and still made it to The Toy Boat by 12:45 or so, in time to guard some trash from blowing away, .. so Kevin McDonald wasn't greeted by a pile of garbage.

 This is my third workshop with Kevin McDonald. The first two were taking improv and turning it into sketch comedy. This one is writing sketch comedy "writer's room" style. I brought in my sketch "Techy Techy Tech Tech". I need to rewrite it,.. right now,...

Tomfoolery & The Shenanigans' second time doing a monthly slot at The Carolina was pretty much right after the first day of the Kevin McDonald workshop. So, Ryan Hand and I were pretty warmed up, comedically, by showtime. The show felt rockier, rougher than or first show. Maybe I am being too self critical. But, man,.. improv seems hard. I think practicing once a week or even twice a week and performing once a month, isn't nearly enough. I wanna practice once a week and perform five times a week.

I really do need to work on my re-write for the workshop. The sketch is about status change. And, I need to figure out how to hone in on that transformation emphasis.

I wanna practice ten times a week, & perform twenty times a week

I haven't explained The Igloo Abattoir, yet. When Tomfoolery and The Shenanigans came up with the setlist for the second show, we started practicing the show, in show order. Ryan, Mike, and I have been doing "All The Fun In Half The Time". In practice, we find that the quicker we take action in a scene, the better it becomes. Only, we've made a habit of equating action with violence. The scenes work pretty consistently, since we realized how important action is in this game.
What started as a simple igloo quickly turned into an Icy Abattoir with razor blades on spring loaded doors.

I wanna perform three shows a night five nights a week 

and five shows on Saturday, black on Sunday

If my lovely scene partner reads this,.. I <3 you. 1stLineLastLine Friends Forever. However, tonight taught me an important lesson. Which I am going to dub, "Rigel's 7th rule of Improv Etiquitte":

DONT ROOFIE YOURSELF

or in any other way render yourself useless

Maybe I only want to perform five to seven times a week...

But for real, though. I have to work on my rewrite.

Come see the show tomorrow,

Saturday 1/31/15

@ The Toy Boat

8pm